BBBZzzzzzz….. click! Oh, son-of-a… I can’t believe I am once again opening my eyes and doing this again! Nooooo! Uughh …. Gotta pee. Gotta PEE! Shit that hurts, my ankles are always stiff in the morning…. lalalalaaa, COLD!AHHH!! Toilet seats need to evolve. Hi Puppy! Puppy puppy puppy. Dog needs food… *sigh* This is not general affection, this is, “I need my morning food, human.” Stupid dog. This dog food smells disgusting. At least she likes it. I am gonna slip and bleed out on this fucking tile floor! Now what? FUUUUCK….. stupid cheating asshole bastard last night got FUCKING CAUGHT! HA! I saw you fucker!!!! Whats for breakfast? Something chocolate? naaaa come on girl…. thats crazy, too early. Vodka?…. maybe. Whats a bloody mary and how do I make it? Ketchup? Why do they spell that stuff so many ways? I smell a fart but Im alone…. thats not me, is it? Cereal, then vodka. Whats on besides Lets Make A Deal and Soap Operas? When the hell was I watching CNN?! Crazy! My fingers are really stubby, like hobbit hands. Hi puppy! (Loveshack tune-) Butt-scratch puppppyyyyyyy! Butt scratch! puppy butt-scratch!….. Ooooo COPS is on! always, but it will never let you down! Whatcha gonna dooooooo? Whatcha gonna dooo when they come for youuu, bad boys bad boys! Hahaha. All suspects are innocent until proven guilty, INA COURTA LAWW! Yeah right! This always makes me feel better about my life……………….. ……………. ………… ……. …. .. .

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